Although the title of this article resonates with many people, both men and women, some male readers may be offended by it, feeling it implies that men are innately less willing or less able to communicate than women. They may feel we discriminate against the male of our species by viewing him as defective in this regard, and needful of expert intervention to measure up to women’s superior abilities.
Let’s clarify.
First of all, there are far greater differences between individuals of the same gender than between the two genders in the ability to express ideas and to understand what is heard. We know of no innate differences between men and women’s abilities to communicate ideas.
Where differences generally arise is in the area of emotions and feelings. Although in many relationships, neither partner has a problem communicating in this arena, and in others it is the woman who is more emotionally tongue-tied, the man—because of the way boys are socialized in most cultures—is more often the one who is seen as less emotionally communicative in relationships where this is an issue.
Because this is a source of much pain and frustration both for these men and their partners, we believe it warrants special attention. We hope the reader can relate to what we see as an important human problem experienced to a large extent, but certainly not exclusively, by men.