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 Marriage 101 - Collective Guidance
Getting the Love You Wantby Harville Hendrix, Ph.D.  About This BookMy purpose in writing this book is twofold: to share with you what I have learned about the psychology of love relationships, and to help you transform your relationship into a lasting source of love and companionship. In short, it's a book about the theory and practice of becoming passionate friends. The book is divided into three parts. In Part I, I chronicle the fate of most relationships: attraction, romantic love, and the power struggle. As I describe the familiar details of married life, I invite you to see them as an emerging psychological drama. I call this drama "The Unconscious Marriage," and by that I mean a marriage that includes all the hidden desires and automatic behaviors that are left over from childhood and that inexorably lead couples into conflict. In Part II, I explore a radically different kind of marriage, "The Conscious Marriage," a marriage that helps you satisfy your unmet childhood needs in positive ways. First, I will explain a proven technique for rekindling romantic love. This process restores a spirit of cooperation and gives you the motivation to work on your underlying problems. Next I will show you how to replace confrontation and criticism, tactics learned in childhood, with a healing process of mutual growth and support. Finally, I will describe how to convert your pent-up frustration into empathy and understanding. Part III takes all these ideas and packages them into unique, ten-week course in relationship therapy. Through a series of proven, step-by-step exercises that you can do in the privacy of your home, you will be able to resolve them -- perhaps without the expense of a marital therapist. This book can help you create a more loving and supportive relationship, and it is within this revitalized marriage that you will find peace and joy. Copyright © 1988 Harville Hendrix
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