There is a song I hear on the local Christian radio station called “What sin?” It is a beautiful song that tells about God’s forgive-and-forget approach to sin. God is not one to be forgetful. He knows everything! We would be in big trouble if He forgot things as we do. In God’s case, however, He chooses to forget what He wants to forget. For example, He chooses to forget our sins. Why does He do that? Because He wants a perfect relationship of love between Himself and us. To remember our sins would only create division between God and us. That is why God forgets all the sins we do against Him and why we ought to approach our spouses in this way.
Although we may regret certain sins all our life and feel that God couldn’t possibly be pleased with us after all we did, we must remember that God has long forgiven and forgotten those sins that eat us up, as well as the ones that don’t bother us as much. It is so freeing not to worry about my current relationship with God because of my past sins. When we say “I’m so sorry for x, y, and z,” all God can say in reply is “What sin?” God’s word says,“ As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us.” (Psalm 103:12) “I can forgive, but I can’t forget” is another way of saying, “I will not forgive.”
I can’t even begin to fathom how huge God’s love is for us! I am so glad He chooses to forgive-and-forget my sins—past, present and future! Ought we not follow in this same manner of love when we are at odds with our spouse? Let’s make it a point that next time we spend time with God in prayer to ask the Lord to please give us a sincere desire to forgive-and-forget every offense against us, especially those from our mate and to help us do just that!
How do you define forgiveness? Is it pardoning someone’s sin against you? Sure, that’s half of it. But what about forgetting the sin? I have heard it said by many people, “Oh I can forgive them, but I’ll never forget it!” That may be true to some extent, however the Lord can erase those memories from our minds if we ask Him to.
When we truly forgive our spouse, we are, in essence, tearing and burning up his or her record of wrongs against us. God forgives us this way. Ought we not to forgive our spouse
by this same standard?
It seems that a lot of people have not yet put together the correlation between forgiving and truly forgetting. Here’s the correlation. Suppose your mate said something that offended you. Verbally, you may tell him, “I forgive you;” however, if you keep that offense tucked away in the attic of your memory to later be used against your spouse at a later, convenient time, is that really forgiveness? Think about it.
Score-keeping the actions of your spouse is one of the quickest ways to fall into the clutches of divorce. If you must keep a score card on your spouse make sure it is one that adds all the wonderful words and deeds of your beloved.
If God’s definition of forgiveness was simply a verbal expression of forgiveness but rubbed our noses in our sins for the rest of our lives and all eternity that would be torture! Needless to say, it wouldn’t be the ideal way to maintain a close and trusting relationship. God knows this.
He wants a personal and loving relationship with us where trust abounds. Perhaps this is why the Lord remembers our sins no more. May we practice the Lord’s kind of forgiveness in our marriages and own daily living. Consider the words of God from the book of Isaiah: “I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.” (Isaiah 43:25)