Should We Marry

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Guidelines

Anne and John grew up in the same area of central Michigan but did not meet until they both began college. The two of them fell in love while at Michigan State. He pursued a degree as a packaging engineer, and she sought a diploma in art history.

Their relationship developed and they began to plan their marriage, but Anne needed first to secure a master’s degree, if she hoped to find future employment in that field. Fortunately, an opportunity for the advanced study materialized at a large university in the east.

What to do?

She accepted the offer and moved to that eastern city; John then found a job with International Paper that both utilized his education and enabled him to live near Anne’s university. They rented an apartment between his job and her school, moved in together, and reserved a church for the wedding scheduled about a year later.

Anne was initially quite nervous when they met with the priest to arrange details. Her sister back home had been turned down by the local pastor when she sought to marry in their parish church because she was living with her fiancé. Anne feared a similar response, but that was not the case.

In the ensuing months Anne and John attended Mass quite regularly, participated in the diocesan marriage preparation program, and planned details of the wedding ceremony.

Following marriage and graduation with her master’s degree, she found employment on the west coast, and John transferred to another company near San Francisco. How do they feel now, several years later, about living together before marriage while she completed her studies? They judge that for them it was the right thing to do.

But what about other couples, like yourselves? Are there suggestions for persons in love who either are living together or are contemplating that move? This chapter will offer some guidelines for them.