“Find out what they like, and how they like it, and let ‘em have it just that way.”

When he wrote these lyrics for a Fats Waller tune many years ago, lyricist Andy Razaf probably never imagined they would become the golden rule of wedding gifts.

Look at it from another angle -- can you find a constructive purpose for 40 toasters in one house? Perhaps you could get 80 hot breakfast pastries to jump up at the same time and make a music video (Jump, Jump! etc.) That’s probably a simpler solution than trying to return all those toasters. Perhaps a better Fats Waller tune would be “The Joint is Jumpin’.”

But seriously folks, one of the benefits of life in an enlightened age is that bridal couples get to choose what they want for wedding gifts, confident that family and friends would much rather buy something the couple wants than contribute one more cast member to the “toaster rockettes.” The modern mechanism created to document those preferences and their purchase is called a bridal registry.

Believe it or not, J.C. Penney’s and Tiffany’s do have something in common -- namely a highly evolved, computer oriented registry system. In fact, these computer registries are popular with lots of retailers across the United States. The concept is simple. The bridal couple walks into one branch of the store, meets with a representative and then walks around identifying those items they wish to receive as gifts. A list of these gifts and their prices is entered into a main computer database under the bride’s name. Thereafter, anyone wishing to purchase one or more for the couple can telephone a toll-free number, place the order and probably pay for it using their chosen major credit card. Meanwhile, the couple can call in at any time to check the status of their registry, which gifts have been purchased, etc.

Keep in mind that there is no rule that says the couple can only visit the store once. For many couples, the “information overload” of looking through 250,000 items and trying to anticipate their needs over the next ten years is just too much. The remedy is simple -- break up the gift selection process into two or three visits.