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LOOKING FOR MR. (OR MISS) RIGHT?
Here are the Seven Most Critical Factors for Choosing a Mate
By Neil Clark Warren, Ph.D.
As a psychologist who works with dozens of singles and married couples every year, I am constantly amazed at how many people stumble their way into marriage--and then wonder why their relationship grows miserably stagnant or chronically contentious. They simply did not approach this monumental decision objectively and proactively.
If you want to give yourself the best chance for a fulfilling and lasting marriage, consider the following factors for choosing a mate:
- Your choice of whom to marry is more crucial than everything else combined that you will ever do to make your marriage succeed. This principle may sound like a no-brainer, but you would be surprised at the large percentage of singles who have the attitude that says, "I just want to get married, and once I've got my man (or woman), then we'll work things out." Lonely and worried they'll never marry, many singles are so intent on getting to "I do" that they don't invest the necessary time and effort to make a great decision. Most of the failed marriages I have encountered were in trouble the day they began. The two people involved simply chose the wrong person to marry.
- Couples who date for two years or more have a significantly better chance of building a happy, lasting marriage. I become very alarmed when two people tell me they have known each other a couple of months, and now they're ready to make a lifelong commitment. When a couple is ready to decide on something as all encompassing as marriage after only a few months of dating, I assume their decision is long on fantasy and short on reality. It tells me that the hard work of marriage is being seriously underestimated. In fact, research shows that couples who dated for two years or more scored consistently higher on marital satisfaction than couples who dated for shorter periods of time.
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All People Want Love 
